I participate in a few volunteer organizations. As those groups move away from email communication and into randomly chosen social apps, I’m seeing a degradation of our collective, global wellbeing. Groups that once proposed and resolved questions with email* now dither on some randomly selected app and require me to be…social. This is not a change in the proper direction.

I’m sure that the pandemic is changing the way adults interact digitally, but it feels like every GroupMe or Slack conversation devolves into the polite equivalent of the comments section on a YouTube video. If someone in a group asks, “who intends to work at the fund-raiser next weekend?”, instead of, ‘yep’ or ‘nope’, I have to pick my way through a half-dozen I-heard-the-notification-on-my-phone-and-wanted-to-let-you-all-know-that-I’m-here-and-I-should-probably-type-lots-of-words-to-show-you-how-engaged-I-am messages.

This isn’t efficient and I’m always late to (or completely miss) the party because:

  1. I don’t like my phone to buzz like a teenager’s with constant notifications.
  2. I scroll to the bottom of the chat, see lots of nonsense, and promptly forget about it.

I do recognize that this is completely my problem. If I took the time to read and/or be social, I wouldn’t be writing this particular screed. But, since we’re here, let me humbly propose a global standard for all further digital communication by all groups of more than two.

All posts must add relevant information to the topic at hand.

All posts must adhere to a standard length as detailed below

    • Email – less than 250 words
    • Text – 25 words or less
    • Socal app if asking a question or proposing topic – 25 words or less
    • Socal app if responding – 5 words or less but a single word and/or emoji preferred

There. Now that we’re all singing from the same wavelength, one significant global problem has been solved. Hooray!

*I’m somewhat overstating (and might be actively misrepresenting for dramatic effect) a volunteer group’s ability to propose and resolve issues by any method.